Saturday, June 22, 2013

Sexual Orientation vs. Sexual Preference

Honestly, I never liked those two terms. Those words make me feel that being gay is a choice and that I could have chosen otherwise. 

Why? Sexual Orientation. Orientation. Was I oriented to fall in love with other guys? Did an external factor affected how I feel, that given the chance that this factor is absent, everything could have been different? I'm reviewing my history and could it be true? But I'm only one of the many gay people in this world and one couldn't speak for the group.

Sexual Preference. Preference. Choice. Did I choose to be gay? Did I choose to fall in love with other guys? Believe me, if I had a choice, I would have chosen to be straight so that the complications of being gay in a straight world would be unburdened. It's difficult to be gay. I'm tired of the taunts, the back bites, and those who are judgmental. I could have lessened these to a certain degree if I were straight, I believe. I'm tired of hearing and reading comments that I am psychologically abnormal.

All I know is you don't control who you fall in love with. For straight people, is there a moment in your life that you chose to fall in love with a girl? Could you choose to fall in love with a guy? That's the same for us gays. We didn't choose to fall in love with a guy and certainly we don't control who we fall in love with. Blast the hypothalamus. The hypothalamus is the only thing to blame for releasing the hormones that makes us feel "love". 

Gender studies is a very complicated field. Sociology as well. With all the intricacies of the decisions affected by the external factors and how these decisions affect the society as well as the individual... Haiy, buhay. Too many questions I have in mind. All I could hope for is some answers.

8 comments:

  1. very well said. :))

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    1. Thanks, James! Share the blog as well as the love. :)

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  2. I lean on the orientation concept.

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    1. How come? Care to share your story? Pergaps a blogpost? Thanks for following my blog btw. ;)

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  3. Sexual Orientation and sexual preference is usually interchanged by people or most of the times, they really don't know the meaning.

    Sexual Orientation has something to do with your gender orientation. Like if you're gay, straight, bisexual, lesbian and transgender. Its a sense of identity based on attraction and relative behaviors. Sex is also different from Gender. Sex is more of anatomical and physiological characteristics while Gender is more of genetic characteristic *male or female*

    Sexual preference is your preference sexually. Top, bottom or versa.

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    1. I did a quick google search. They seem to be interchanged. Though I don't know if they're one of those misled. But I've based the post semantics-wise. I guess I should put a disclaimer. :)

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  4. I wonder if you have a different point of view about this topic now that you've know more...

    The word "Orientation" means the position or place of a certain thing or individual in the general plane of existance. When this word is preceeded with the word "Sexual" or "Gender", the meaning of the compound word is your sexual or gender place or location in the population full of sexes.

    "Preference" is synonymous to the word "Choice". Again, when paired to the word "Sexual" or "Gender" the meaning changed to the sex or gender of the person you prefer to be intimate with.

    Interchanged or not, preference is mostly shunned by people because it reduces their identity and places them inside a box. And those struggling to have an indentity of their own, that's the very last thing they want to feel.

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    1. Hey, thanks. That makes more sense. I feel enlightened. The last sentence is something to be pondered. 😊

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