Monday, December 30, 2013

Relationship setups pt. 1

There are two types of relationships (practiced by some homosexuals) I cannot comprehend. 

1.     Rich Dad, Poor Kid - This type is the relationship in which money is largely involved. There's this older gay guy (most likely not visually appealing but not always) who will offer this poor / middle-class younger kid (most likely attractive but not always) money in exchange of agreeing in entering a relationship with him. It may not be a blatant offer and the offer may take form as a courtship. The poor kid may accept willingly or unwillingly the offer, enter into the relationship, and get the monetary benefits he was promised of. 

I usually see this kind of relationship at malls and exclusive restaurants where this older guy wears a lot of flashy items, shows off a latest gadget or two, and has a beefy wallet loaded with cash. His companion, usually a good looking guy, sits quietly eating. They talk rarely, neither one smiles, and both may be busy fiddling with their phone. Recently, I saw one while eating dinner with partner and gestured partner towards the couple.

"Alam na," he said smiling.

"Alam na alin?"

"Na may pera."

"Bakit? Eto naman, napaka-negative. Baka naman mahal lang talaga."

Partner laughed. He may have laughed at my usual naivety at things.

"Sa tingin mo ba love yung nakikita mo?" 

I looked at the couple. The older gay guy seemed busy trying to entertain himself with his high-end mobile phone while the younger kid ate in silence. After finishing their meal, the bill came and was given to the younger kid. The kid gestured the bill towards the oldie and the oldie took his fat wallet and left a thousand peso bill. They stood, still not a word spoken, and I got a good look at the older guy. Aesthetically speaking, one would wonder what the kid saw in the oldie.

Partner's question was left floating in the air.

"Kunwari mag-tito pero di naman magkamukha. Ang pinagtataka ko bakit kailangan pa nila i-display yan in public," partner said.

"Baka naman proud sila. Baka naman walang money involved."

Partner laughed again and I bit my tongue. Am I that naive? Why am I always assuming the best out of people?

Whether or not there is money involved between that particular couple, I cannot deny the fact that such relationship do exist. A relationship in which money plays a vital role that sustains the life of the relationship. Without its source, the relationship is doomed to fail.

Why do some gay guys buy the illusion of love? What do they get out of it? Love may be considered a drug, one so addictive and so destructive. One that can be brought. They'll get a few moments of blissful love, an illusion kept alive by monetary value. Once the value is lost, so is the illusion and the older gay guy will be usurped to a downward spiral towards loneliness and reality.

Why do some provide the love that nobody deserves? Are the shouts of his needs stronger than the whisper of his conscience? Love may be a form of entertainment, one fictionalized and staged. One that may not be played out very well. The older gay guy is the producer and the younger is the actor under contract. As long as the salary is provided, the actor plays the part he is asked to act out. If the salary is not present repeatedly, the actor may look for another producer and the endless spiral of acting resumes. He is forever devoid of reality unless an opportunity for another form of source of income presents itself.

The only answer I could think of can be derived from the field of economics: the concept of the marriage market model. In its premise, a partnership is established given that consumption and labor supply is finalized and reached. Since this concept is satisfied in this type of relationship, it can be said that a working partnership is formed. Who are we to judge? Who am I to ask? The setup is working for them and they don't deserve to be questioned or rudely stared at.

We walked around the mall and saw the couple once again. A distance can be seen between them.

Love can either be a need or a want therefore it may take a form of commodity and all of us should be willing to pay its price in one mean or another regardless of intentions.


How about you? Have you been in this type or relationship or do you know someone who buys or provides the illusion of love? I'm looking forward to sharing your thoughts.

On a side note: I should learn how to write concisely. I may lose my audience halfway through reading the post.


  1. sadly may mga ganyan talaga...this is the older guy's happiness maybe..he must be lonely.

    pero mayroon pa din naman siya makikita na kasing age bracket niya..pero who are we to judge di ba. baka pagdating natin sa ganun edad ganun na din tayo ka desperado sa atensyon at pagmamahal hihihi

    1. Yep, who are we to judge. Baka mamaya nga naman later on ganun na rin tayo. :3

  2. kadalasan nangyayari ang ganyan... minsan ung mas bata kumakapit lang sa patalim dahil kailangan niya....

    mapalad ung may love na nararamdaman.... pero malay natin... ung iba tunay na nagmamahal....

    may nakilala ako noon... bata pa siya.... pero minahal niya ang older guy.... un nga lang di siya pinaniniwalaan.. kasi nga may money involve....

    1. Oooooh, um, break na ba sila? Sayang naman. Ang hirap din pala kapag napamahal na rin si actor kay producer tapos hindi naniwala si producer. Pano nga kaya kapag ganun?

  3. My two cents: we have different reasons for being in a relationship and love is just one of them. who are we to say that love should only be the reason?

    1. I never saw it that way, Earl. Thanks for pointing that out. :)

  4. it's not naivety to think good of other people. it's a gift. it's rare to find people that sees the good and the positive things nowadays.

    relationships, alas, is not just based on love as Earl said. It is based on a lot of things. And to see a couple, if they are indeed a couple, not enjoying the company of one another, doesn't mean that they are not happy together. Maybe they're just having a bad day. I'm sure we all had one.

    Money, love, comfort, desire, lust, trust, whatever the reason is, a relationship is a relationship and those who are not inside the said relationship can not and should not assume what merits a successful relationship. What works for you and me may not work for them. To each his own as the saying goes.

    On the side note, your posts are not long. This comment is long. :D

  5. Ooohhh ikaw na ang supee positive...well i believe kasing natututunan ang pagmamahal. At nabibili rin. Pwedeng magsimula sa gamitan pero sa huli, naging true love naman.... hmmnnn... swerte taung hindi na kailangang mag-invest para magkaroon ng pagmamahal...

    1. Di naman ganung kapositive.

      Ooooh, love can be taught nga naman. :3

  6. Ive seen those and they dont really seem like a very good loving couple.. But maybe for some it really is true love talaga.. :)

    1. Yep. May true love rin ron somewhere deep inside. :3

  7. unfortunately, thats a sad reality.

    natatakot ako na pag tumanda ako mauwi ako sa ganyan. lol

    pero seriously, yan din iniisip ko kung paano naaatim nung mga matatandang beks yung ganung set up. at the end of the day alam mong niloloko mo lang ang sarili mo. at alam mo na ang pag-ibig sayo ay ang naging isa na ring commodity na kailangan mong bilhin. shet ang saklap.

    1. You will find him. Kapit lang! :3

      Siguro ok na rin yung ganyang setup. As long as nakukuha ng both parties yung gusto nila and as long as they're willing to sacrifice. Consumption and goods and services offered ika nga.

  8. maybe its true love tom daley's boyfriend is 20 years older than him and its not like hes into the money since hes rich